The Tragical History of
LG and SubZero
Fridges of Mosinski
Act II
May 20, 2008: 3:45pm
LG and SubZero
Fridges of Mosinski
Act II
May 20, 2008: 3:45pm
Sears Delivery Man: Hey.
Jen: Hi, the fridge is in here.
Sears Delivery Man: That's a SubZero.
Jen: Yes, I realize that.
Sears Delivery Man: I can't take a SubZero.
Jen: But we paid extra and cleared it with two managers.
Sears Delivery Man: I can't take a SubZero. It's attached to the wall.
Jen: No, it's not. You can roll it right out.
Sears Delivery Man: You'll have to talk with my manager, cause I won't take it. Dials number. Hey, we're at the house and they have a SubZero. Can you tell her we can't take it? Hands phone to Jen.
Jen: Hello?
Orlando: Hi, my name is Orlando, I hear that you have a SubZero. We can't remove a SubZero from the wall.
Jen: But it's not attached to the wall. You can just roll it right out. And we already cleared this through two managers and have placed several calls.
Orlando: Well, we just can't take it. We don't take SubZero fridges. I can have the delivery guys leave your new fridge in a convenient location and you can arrange for someone to pick up your old fridge.
Jen: The owner of the house will be here in a moment. You'll have to explain this to him.
Orlando: Okay.
Jen: Why won't you take the fridge exactly? It's not attached to the wall, we paid extra, and all of the managers said that it was okay.
Orlando: That's something you'll have to take up with your sales associate.
Jen: But why would they say they'd take the fridge knowing that you can't?
Orlando: SubZeros have a compressor with freon in it. We can't have the freon on our trucks. If the compressor were removed --
Jen: -- So you do take SubZeros?
Orlando: Well, yes, but only if the compressor is removed.
Jen: So remove it.
Orlando: A technician needs to do that.
Jen: So where's the technician?
Orlando: You'll need to take that up with your sales associate. Right now I can have the guys set up the new fridge in a convenient location for you and then you can have the compressor removed later. Once the compressor is removed, we can come back and pick up the fridge free of charge.
Jen: Of course it will be free of charge, this is your mistake.
Orlando: Well, that's not entirely clear.
Jen: The owner is almost here, you're going to have to speak with him about this. You can't leave here without taking the old fridge.
Orlando: Is there anything else I can help you with today?
Jen: No. The owner will be calling you in a minute. Hangs up.
Manish, the owner, arrives.
Jen: Hey Manish, they won't take the fridge.
Manish: Yes, they will.
Jen: I just got off the phone and the manager said that they'll take the fridge if the compressor is removed.
Manish: So let's take off the compressor.
Sears Delivery Man: Look, I don't have time to wait for you to remove the compressor.
Jen: Listen, I just waited two and a half hours for you. Now you can wait for me.
Jen: Hi, the fridge is in here.
Sears Delivery Man: That's a SubZero.
Jen: Yes, I realize that.
Sears Delivery Man: I can't take a SubZero.
Jen: But we paid extra and cleared it with two managers.
Sears Delivery Man: I can't take a SubZero. It's attached to the wall.
Jen: No, it's not. You can roll it right out.
Sears Delivery Man: You'll have to talk with my manager, cause I won't take it. Dials number. Hey, we're at the house and they have a SubZero. Can you tell her we can't take it? Hands phone to Jen.
Jen: Hello?
Orlando: Hi, my name is Orlando, I hear that you have a SubZero. We can't remove a SubZero from the wall.
Jen: But it's not attached to the wall. You can just roll it right out. And we already cleared this through two managers and have placed several calls.
Orlando: Well, we just can't take it. We don't take SubZero fridges. I can have the delivery guys leave your new fridge in a convenient location and you can arrange for someone to pick up your old fridge.
Jen: The owner of the house will be here in a moment. You'll have to explain this to him.
Orlando: Okay.
Jen: Why won't you take the fridge exactly? It's not attached to the wall, we paid extra, and all of the managers said that it was okay.
Orlando: That's something you'll have to take up with your sales associate.
Jen: But why would they say they'd take the fridge knowing that you can't?
Orlando: SubZeros have a compressor with freon in it. We can't have the freon on our trucks. If the compressor were removed --
Jen: -- So you do take SubZeros?
Orlando: Well, yes, but only if the compressor is removed.
Jen: So remove it.
Orlando: A technician needs to do that.
Jen: So where's the technician?
Orlando: You'll need to take that up with your sales associate. Right now I can have the guys set up the new fridge in a convenient location for you and then you can have the compressor removed later. Once the compressor is removed, we can come back and pick up the fridge free of charge.
Jen: Of course it will be free of charge, this is your mistake.
Orlando: Well, that's not entirely clear.
Jen: The owner is almost here, you're going to have to speak with him about this. You can't leave here without taking the old fridge.
Orlando: Is there anything else I can help you with today?
Jen: No. The owner will be calling you in a minute. Hangs up.
Manish, the owner, arrives.
Jen: Hey Manish, they won't take the fridge.
Manish: Yes, they will.
Jen: I just got off the phone and the manager said that they'll take the fridge if the compressor is removed.
Manish: So let's take off the compressor.
Sears Delivery Man: Look, I don't have time to wait for you to remove the compressor.
Jen: Listen, I just waited two and a half hours for you. Now you can wait for me.
Sears Delivery Man goes outside and starts swearing. Returns with Manager Orlando on the phone. Hands phone to Manish. Manish leaves with phone, returns and begins moving refrigerator from the wall. After a while it's determined that the old fridge will be moved to the garage and the new fridge will be installed. Sears Delivery Man and Associate take old fridge out to driveway on a dolly.
End Act II
End Act II
1 comment:
Can you sell the rights to SNL so they could make a skit about it? This is incredible!!!!! I can totally see Will Ferrell being the delivery guy. Are you coming to MP soon? I want to see you!!!
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